It’s not fair.
These were the words I heard myself say while brewing my morning tea. It hit me how I’ll probably never again have a morning without chores. Or, leave that, it hit me how much my life has changed. Angry and maybe a little depressed too, it hit me how much a woman’s life changes post child birth, how much more than anyone else’s.
My body, with all the changes it has undergone, has begun to protest. I feel weak and exhausted every moment of everyday. All the perks aside, it’s taxing beyond imagination.
While stirring my tea, I was angry at how things worked. I was angry because I stared at a life without a day off, even during holidays.
Such big problems. Genuine problems too.
Actually, not at all.
I had all the help I needed, all the facilities too and here I was complaining. Shamelessly at that.
If I was feeling my life was tough or unfair, it was just an overreaction. Instead of being thankful, I was taking the easy way out. I was blaming everyone around me. My problems were not even close to being problems but I was feeling miserable. Truth is, I was just being myopic.
So, instead of sulking, let me tell you about a woman who has been dealing with problems all her life and still hasn’t lost her smile or the will to fight. A woman who hasn’t given in to complaining instead has been toiling hard to work things out.
I don’t know her name because all the time I was with her, it never occurred to me that I ask. I kept addressing her as aap like they do in Hindi. I just got lost in her life.
So, here’s her story.
She was born in a not so well off family somewhere in Uttar Pradesh. Growing up, her father had abandoned her so she never got to know a father’s love. She was the youngest in a family of four but lived like a grown up for as long as she remembers. But that never stopped her from hoping for a better future. She never brooded over her problems instead tried solving them. She believed things would change one day.
Years later that change came in the form of a husband and a loving home. Or, so she thought. But the second time around too her dreams were shattered.
The man she thought would redeem her life’s tragedy with love turned out to be a womaniser. Every other day he would bring someone new home, aided and abetted by his family, and all she could do was be a mute spectator. If she protested, she was beaten black and blue. With no qualification or job, she didn’t know what to do.
Things had gone from bad to worse when she found out she was pregnant with his child. But even that didn’t stop the torture. Thus third time around life disappointed her. Her troubles didn’t end with just verbal and physical abuse this time. Her son was just a year old when they threw her out of the house.
She had nowhere to go, no one to turn to and an infant to take care of. She sought the help of an NGO against her husband and his family but even for that, to take them to court, she had no money. And without a court order she couldn’t make him pay for their son or maintenance.
Today, about ten years later, she works as a cook to support herself and her son. She lives in a rented house and sends him to school.
A silver lining in her cloudy life came in the form of her son’s grades which helped secure an NGO’s funding for his education. One tiny blessing in a messy life.
This woman I write about here, has never stayed down inspite of life shoving her to the rock bottom several times. She could have given up but she fights everyday. She fights for a better life for her son. Selflessly too.
But her troubles aren’t over yet.
Her in-laws suddenly want their grandson back. No, not to educate him or take care of him but to keep him as a household help. They have even threatened her life in an attempt to scare her into giving up her son. And when that didn’t work, they are now trying to entice her 10 year old with sweets and chocolates. They know she doesn’t earn enough to give all that a child might fancy and they are using that against her. Sad thing is her son is slowly tilting away from her as well. Not really his fault because he’s still a child. Still, imagine her pain!
But inspite of all the odds, she’s still holding fort with a smile on her face. She is still not giving up. And she has told me that she won’t give up either, atleast till she has her son with her.
Inspiring lady, isn’t she?
And here I was making a mountain out of a mole hill.
I think we could all learn a little something from her. I certainly could. She makes me want to look beyond my perceived troubles, be a better person and be grateful for what I have.
If she’s not the woman to learn something from, who is?
Do you have a postive and inspirational story you would like to share with us today? While a true story is preferred, a work of fiction is also welcome as long as it has an inspiring central character/s. It may be an old post, or one that you are inspired to write today or over the next month. We’d love to read them and highlight them too.
Add your post to the linky below and read, comment on and share the posts of others. The linky will be open until our next #InspiringStories post is up i.e. the 4th Saturday of June.